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Jewish Jokes

Jewish Jokes

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Vodka

A Jewish father once tried to teach his young son the evils of alcohol. He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the water lived, while the one in the whiskey curled up and died.
 
"All right, Yaakov," asked the father, "what does that show you?" "Well, Daddy, it shows that if you drink alcohol, you will not have worms."

Jewish Husband

A little Jewish boy was telling his mother about how he had won a part in a play that was being done at school. His mother asked, "What is the part you will play, Saul?" Saul responded, "I shall play the Jewish husband," to which the mother replied, "Well, you go right back to that teacher and tell her that you want a SPEAKING part!"

Visitor

An Israeli landed at Heathrow Airport in London. At the control the officer asked: “Occupation”? The Israeli instinctively responded: “No just for a visit”.
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