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Jewish Jokes

Jewish Jokes

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Barber

A Catholic Priest walks into a barbers to have his hair cut. The barber cuts his hair, then the Priest asks how much he owes. The barber says, "Oh, no! I couldn't take any money from you, you're a holy man!"  The Priest thanks him and leaves. The next morning, the barber finds 12 diamonds outside his door.

Later, a Buddhist monk comes to have his head shaved. The barber does it, then the monk asks how much he owes. The barber says, "Oh, no! I couldn't take money from a holy man!" The monk thanks him and leaves. The next morning the barber finds 12 rubys outside his door.

Later, a Jewish Rabbi comes to have his locks tended. The barber does so, then the Rabbi asks how much he owes. The barber says,"Oh, no! I couldn't take money from a holy man!" The Rabbi thanks him and leaves. The next morning the barber finds 12 Rabbis outside his door!


 

Prayer

Little Yossi and his family were having dinner at his bubbe's house. When everyone was seated, the food was served. As soon as little Yossi got his plate, he started eating from it right away.
"Yossi, please wait until we say our prayer," said his father.
"I don't have to," Yossi replied.
"Of course you have to," said his mother. "Don't we always say a prayer before eating at our house?"
"Yes, but that's our house," Yossi explained. "This is bubbe's house and she knows how to cook."

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