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Jewish Jokes

The Sweater

Moishe is being indoctrinated by the Russian government:
Govt. Official: "If you had a yacht, what would you do with it?"
Moishe: "Give it to Mother Russia."
Govt. Official: "And if you had a palace, what would you do with it?"
Moishe: "Give it to Mother Russia."
Govt. Official: "And if you had a sweater, what would you do with it?"
No reply.
Government official asks the question again.
And still not reply.
Finally he shouts: "Moishe, why don't you reply?"
Moishe: "Because I have a sweater."

Wise Men

Two five year old children, one Jewish and the other Catholic, are playing in the sandbox.

Sean says to David, "Our priest knows more than your rabbi!"

David replies, "Of course he does. You guys tell him everything!"

Matchmaker

A woman runs into a theatre in Israel, calling out "Is there a doctor in the house, doctor, doctor?!!!"
 
The play stops, the lights go on, and three men get up, each saying "I am a doctor - how can I help?"
 
"Oy!", answers the woman, .... "have I got a girl for you!"
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